There comes a moment when your soul stops trying to convince the room.
Not because you're angry.
Not because you're defeated.
But because you finally realize, you were never meant to be on trial.
In May, something quiet snapped inside me.
A thread I’d been holding for far too long. The need to explain myself. To soften my tone and to shape-shift in the name of “peace.” It all started to fall away...
When people don’t understand you, it’s easy to start editing yourself. You try to explain what you meant. You lower your voice so it doesn’t sound “too much,” and you offer disclaimers with your truth:
“I didn’t mean it like that…”
“I’m just trying to help…”
“I swear my heart’s in the right place…”
But here’s the thing.
When your goodness threatens someone’s comfort, no amount of softening will make them see you clearly.
When You Stop Trying to Be Innocent, You Become Free
I used to waste energy trying to show people I was harmless. I was afraid of being misread. I was afraid of someone thinking I was selfish, sharp, too confident, too spiritual, too sensitive, too something. But that fear? It’s not mine anymore.
I am good, even when I draw a boundary.
I am good, even when I’m quiet.
I am good, even when I don’t explain myself.
I don’t owe anyone an edited version of me just so they feel safe. Because I finally feel safe with ME.
They Were Never Meant to Understand Your Light
Let’s be honest. Some people will never see you clearly. Not because you are unclear, but because seeing you as you are would’ve meant facing the parts of them they’ve spent years avoiding.
Your confidence?
Makes them question why they keep doubting themselves.
Your softness?
Exposes how harsh they’ve become.
Your honesty?
Hits the places they’ve been lying to themselves for far too long.
And instead of saying “Wow, that’s inspiring,” they choose “You’re too much.” So they shrunk you down in their minds, labelling you as dramatic, arrogant, ungrateful, and intense. But that’s not who you are. That’s who they needed you to be so they could stay comfortable.
And guess what?
You’re not required to carry the projections of people who’ve never done their own healing.
You’re not responsible for dimming your joy because someone else is stuck in their suffering.
And finally, you’re not here to prove you’re good just because someone couldn’t feel your goodness through their own numbness.
In May, I finally said—“ENOUGH.” Not out loud. Not in some emotional showdown.
“I don’t need to be understood to be whole.”
“I don’t need to be softer to be worthy.”
“I don’t need to be quieter to be safe.”
And with that, I walked out of the courtroom.
So What Do You Do With This?
You stop rehearsing your defense.
You stop walking into rooms bracing for misunderstanding.
You stop thinking your softness has to be earned. Or your confidence needs to be explained. Or your truth needs to come with disclaimers.
You let the people who never saw you stay blind. And you bless them anyway.
If something in you has been tightening, shrinking, biting your tongue just to stay “nice” or “humble” or “not too much”...here’s your permission to stop.
Not because you’re angry.
Not because you’re bitter.
But because you’re ready.
You are ready to be seen without shrinking.
You are ready to be whole without proving.
And you are ready to walk forward without fear of who won’t clap.
Let them misread you. Let them wonder.
You’re not on trial anymore.
You’re free.
Keep Walking This Way...
If this landed in your chest and if something in you softened or stood taller while reading, don’t stop here. This space isn’t about performance. It’s about remembering who you really are, beneath the noise, the roles, and the defenses.
🛒 Keep reading the blog. Let it meet you where you are. One post, one breath, one truth at a time. And if someone you love has been silently trying to prove their worth, pass this along.
Let them know: they’re not on trial either.
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